


Solmates

by moderatelyRambunctious



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Sgrub Session, Attempt at Romance, College, Fluff, Humanstuck, M/M, Masturbation, Nerdiness, Oral Sex, Slow Build, Wow this is stupid
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-01-02
Updated: 2013-07-12
Packaged: 2017-11-23 08:49:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 13,498
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/620275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moderatelyRambunctious/pseuds/moderatelyRambunctious
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Was that...popcorn on the table? Sollux <i>hated</i> popcorn. What was it doing there? And why was his favorite movie playing? The volume was muted, but Karkat knew that Mary Ann was about to confess her love. Just as Jonathon smiled and pulled her into his arms, Sollux came out of their bedroom with Karkat's favorite pajamas in his hands. </p><p>Karkat's eyes narrowed. What was this guy's game?</p><p> </p><p>(New summary, tags, and rating!)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

It was late.

The dull throbbing behind Sollux Captor's eyes made him look up from reassembling a dismantled laptop and gaze at the alarm clock holding sentinel on his desk.

Fuck.

8:55.

He sprang out of his revolving chair, avoided tripping over the wires strewn across the floor, and sprinted to the dresser. He had five minutes to change and hunker down underneath his blankets, feigning sleep. His roommate would be returning from his weekly anger management course and would be in a particularly volatile state of mind. Karkat was always angrier than usual when those meetings ended, as if they caused the human ball of fury to backtrack, rather than progress. Sollux would prefer not to deal with Karkat when he was like this.

Half-way through changing, he heard the tell-tale jingling of keys in the door.

Shit fuck shit shit shi-

He jammed the shirt over his head and, without pausing to don pajama pants, dove into his bed and under the covers. The bedroom door slammed open just as Sollux slammed his eyelids shut. Karkat shuffled into the room, grumbling under his breath. Sollux stiffened; Karkat was only hushed like this when he was exceptionally upset. It took little-to-nothing to provoke him when in this state.

Drawers banged shut, clothes were removed and flung across the room, and pajamas were hastily adorned. Sollux heard Karkat yank his blankets back and waited for him to throw himself onto the mattress.

"Sollux, I know you're fucking awake. Stop ignoring me like a damn pansy."

Mentally groaning, Sollux shifted in bed to look at his roommate. As short, ruffled, and cantankerous as always, Karkat stood in the middle of the room.

Sollux sighed.

"Hey, KK. How wath your meeting?"

"Shut up, lispy. I didn't want you to talk to me. It just pisses me off when you get the dumbass idea that I can't tell when you're faking."

"Thorry, I jutht didn't want to make you more upthet than you already are."

Karkat bristled, "How would you even fucking know how angry I already am, asswipe?"

"Becauthe you alwayth come home pithed off after your meetingth."

"I DO NOT."

"Then why are you yelling at me?"

Karkat glared at him and sank into bed. "Because you're an idiot and I hate you."

Sollux flinched. That stung. He didn't understand why, but he had always wanted Karkat to like him, or at least get along with him. Whenever Karkat threw that phrase around, Sollux felt somewhat distressed that he would never be friends with his roommate. However, he had learned quickly that in order to survive in living with Karkat, he had to give out the insults as good as he got.

"Whatever, jackath. I wath jutht trying to thpare your fucking feelingth."

"Fuck you, and fuck your mock concern. I don't need you meddling in my personal business like some stupid, mystery-seeking kid."

Karkat picked up a pillow from his bed and hit Sollux over the head with it.

Sollux stifled a laugh at the childish display, knowing any further show of amusement would earn him a mini-fist to the face.

"It'th not mock, you dope. I hate it when you come home mad. It meanth I have to avoid getting yelled at."

Karkat slumped back onto his bed and mumbled a response. "I guess I don't have to yell at you so much."

Sollux started. After a moment, the thought had processed in his brain and he broke out into a grin Karkat would describe as "Shit-eating."

"Wipe that stupid smirk off your damn face, fuckass."

"Whatever you thay, KK."

Sollux rolled over and slept, legitimately.

*

The following day was spent on light feet, attempting to avoid waking the slumbering Karkat. Sollux made himself toast and black coffee and settled down in the living room to work on assignments until he had to leave for class.

Ten minutes before his departure, Sollux heated up two Pop-tarts and a new mug of coffee and set them on the table for his roommate.

Smiling to himself, Sollux shut the food behind him, pleased with his peace offering, and set out for his first class of the day.

*

After a mind-numbing internal analysis of his desire to spend copious amounts of money on these pointless, low level classes he wasn't allowed to test out of, Sollux sighed and began the trek back to the apartment. Cracking virus codes was a hobby, not homework. He had finished the week-long assignment in under a half an hour. The teacher had gawked, and then released him early.

The crisp, autumn air smelled sweet and was tantalizingly cool against the twenty-year-old's skin, and it made him contemplate how cold the upcoming winter would be. This time of year had always been his favorite; he loved watching the leaves on the trees change colors.

Sollux had a fascination with colors, his two favorite shades being red and blue, as were his eyes. His heterochromia had gained him a considerable amount of attention early in life, and he was occasionally asked about it even now, but he had learned to handle the uncomfortable questions with maturity. After 20 years of being an anomaly, his eyes didn't bother him anymore.

He chuckled as he thought of Karkat. He was five foot, two inches, nineteen years-old, and consistently picked-on for having skipped a grade. They had only been roommates for two years, but had been relatively close friends in high school.

His mind on the feisty man, Sollux readjusted the grocery bags in his arms and unlocked the apartment door.

The lights were off.

That was strange; Karkat was normally home before Sollux was. Setting the bags on the counter, Sollux headed to their bedroom to put on more comfortable clothes. He flicked the light switch, then quickly shut it back off as a deep hiss resonated through the room.

"Uh, Karkat? Ith thomething wrong?"

Without waiting for an answer, Sollux makes his way to Karkat's bed, trying to identify his shape in the mass of blankets.

A low rumble that sounds distinctly like "Fuck off, lispy," greets him, and he sighs.

"KK, I'm jutht trying to help."

Sollux let out a startled yelp when a small, clammy hand reached out and latched onto his wrist. With surprising strength, Karkat pulled Sollux into the cocoon of comforters. In the darkness, Sollux could barely make out a glare from red-rimmed eyes.

"KK…KK, have you been crying?"

"Hey, look, you aren't completely oblivious. Yes, fuckbrains, I have. Unfortunately for you and your bottom-of-the-scale intelligence, it is none of your GODDAMN business, so kindly FUCK OFF."

Sollux sighed and started to push off of the bed.

"You know what, KK? I'm thick of the way you alwayth get mad at me for trying to do you a favor. I jutht want you to feel better and not tho pithed off all the time. Why are you tho-"

Karkat pulled gently on the wrist he still had an iron grip on.

"Shut the hell up and cuddle me, you nosy, insatiable piece of shit."

Sollux was lost for words as short, warm arms wound around his waist and a mop of black hair tucked under his chin to rest on his chest.

"My day was rougher than un-lubricated, anal sex with the goddamn grand canyon, I'm pissed off, I don't want to talk about it, and the fucking neighbors will report me if I punch the wall again, so this retarded hug is going to have to calm me down. I swear on everything you have ever loved that if you mock me for this solitary moment of weakness, I will piss in your cereal every morning until you're so old you can't taste it anymore."

The arms around Sollux trembled, and, as they lay together, slowly relaxed into sleep.

Sollux's last conscious thought was, "Well, at least he isn't punching me."

*

Sollux woke warm, calm, and slightly confused. Why did his chest feel so hot? When did his blankets get so soft?

A quiet groan made his eyes shoot open. His initial fear subsided into subdued amusement when he registered Karkat, sleep mussed, relaxed, and pressed into Sollux's chest. The memories of the previous night flooded his mind, and he made a mental reminder to ask KK why he had been so upset.

Relishing the moment, Sollux lowered his head to rest on Karkat's and closed his eyes. This side of KK was rare and valuable, and it was probably the reason for Sollux's unnatural attraction to his friend.

Wait. Scratch that. Sollux was definitely NOT attracted to Karkat.

The little shit was abusive and rude and liked god-awful romantic comedies and he was cute and cuddly and liked to cook Sollux dinner and made stellar cupcakes and he looked so soft and kissable and…

Oh.

Fuck.

God damn KK and his stupid soft side. He was sweet, but only when his guard was down, a fact that excited Sollux to know he was experiencing this miracle.

The peace lasted about thirty minutes longer, the Sollux felt KK stir. Waking up to find himself ensconced in Sollux's arms, Karkat let loose a sharp gasp and a sharper kick to Sollux's shins.

"Ow, KK! What wath that- OOF!" and suddenly, Sollux was on the floor.

"KK, what the actual fuck? It'th your fault I wath in your bed, thinthe you're the one who put me there."

Karkat said nothing, just climbed out of his bed and over Sollux. He gathered clothes and slunk towards the bathroom, presumably to shower.

"Oh, no, you don't!" Sollux sprang off of the floor to block the entrance to the bathroom. "You do not get to act thuper cuddly one minute and then be thilent the next. What wath that all about? Why did you make me thleep with you?"

Karkat blushes a fantastic shade of crimson before muttering, "I needed to know."

"Know what, KK?"

Karkat suddenly lunged at Sollux and pounded him mercilessly with small, anguished fists, until Sollux grabbed hold of his wrists.

"I don't fucking want to tell you! Fuck the hell off, Sollux!"

Sollux sighed for what felt like the fiftieth time that week. "Jutht tell me why, KK."

Karkat huffed out an indignant breath and remained silent.

"Wath it your dad?"

An almost imperceptible shake of Karkat's head.

"Did you fail your pthycology tetht?"

Another shake.

"Did _I_ do thomething wrong?"

Another, more vigorous shake.

"Dammit, KK, jutht thpit it out!"

"FINE. Some douche bag started calling me a faggot, so I told him off. Kanaya overheard and is now convinced the guy was right. I asked for her reasoning and she said-"

Karkat blushed furiously and stopped talking.

"KK, I can't be mad at her or help you unleth you tell me what the thaid."

If Karkat's voice was any softer, Sollux would have thought he was imagining it, but Karkat mumbled out, "She said it was obvious I love you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First, I'd like to say that this is my debut fic on AO3.  
> Secondly, this story can also be found here: [FanFiction.net](http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8721657/1/Solmates)  
> Finally, I'll probably start posting this on tumblr too. So, here, look at my new, crappy blog. [moderatelyRambunctious](http://moderatelyrambunctious.tumblr.com/)
> 
>  
> 
> (p.s. wow holy shit I hope you guys like this)


	2. Chapter 2

Every single molecule of Sollux's strength was pushed into stopping an incredulous grin from sliding onto his face.

The confession hung in the air, heavy and awkward.

"Well, do you think itth obviouth?"

"Since I DON'T FUCKING LOVE YOU, no."

"Then why were you cuddling me latht night? What did you have to know?"

Karkat remained silent.

"Did you at leatht figure it out?"

At this, Karkat's eyes pulled into a glare that could melt steel. "Yeah, I fucking figured it out. I figured out that you are the shittiest pillow ever, you have atrocious morning breath, and if I _was_ gay, it sure wouldn't be for you. You're unattractive, inexcusably stupid, and unbearable. So leave me alone before I floss your molars with my towel." Karkat shoved past Sollux into the bathroom and slammed the door.

*

The rest of the week passed in silence. Karkat found reasons to leave home, and Sollux was to ensconced in his own whirlwind of thoughts to notice. There was a mound of homework and a pile of dishes waiting for him, and his stomach had been empty for days, but his emotions were shouting at him to sit down and discern how to react to Karkat's explosion.

Why had Karkat yelled at him for asking questions? Why did Kanaya think Karkat loved him? Why did it bother Sollux so much that Karkat _didn't_ love him?

Sollux tried to stop the train of thought, but it jumped straight off the tracks and plowed into the forefront of his mind: Sollux wanted Karkat to love him.

He jumped off the edge of the bed, then sat back down. His hands began to shake and a pressing discomfort settled in his gut. He didn't know what to do. How could he possibly know how to handle the situation with Karkat if he couldn't even determine what to do with his own body?

"Oh, fuck. What am I thuppothed to do?" he whispered to himself.

Karkat was out getting lunch with Kanaya, and Sollux knew he would refrain from coming back to the apartment as long as possible. Sollux rose and began to pace the bedroom floor. He needed a plan.

*

Six hours later, it was eight o'clock and Sollux had made absolutely no progress on his quest to win Karkat over, besides deciding that was what he wanted to do. He wasn't sure why he wanted it so badly but he knew he wanted Karkat to smile when he came home.

He wanted Karkat to be happy.

He wanted to _make_ Karkat happy.

An idea shot through him like a lightning bolt. He loped across the room and opened the closet door. Underneath the few clothes they had bothered to hang up laid a plastic container. It took up the entire floor of the small room and was filled to the brim with movie cases, lovingly and painstakingly alphabetized by Karkat.

Sollux plunged his hand into the stacks, fingers searching blindly for a well-worn case. He located it and freed the case from the confines of the box, then absconded to the living room.

Disc placed carefully in the DVD player, Sollux entered the kitchen to make popcorn, which he would cover with salt and extra butter, just the way Karkat liked it.

A glance at the clock on the kitchen wall told him Karkat usually came home in ten minutes.

The microwave dinged. Sollux grabbed the bag and opened it, burning himself in the process. The popcorn was dumped into a bowl, coated with necessary seasonings, and placed unceremoniously on the coffee table in the living room.

He pressed "play" on the remote and settled onto the couch with Karkat's favorite blanket tucked over his legs. The movie's opening credits began and Sollux tried to get comfortable on the couch, but was too nervous.

As Sollux expected, the door opened quietly about ten minutes later. Karkat stood in the doorway, shivering and soaking wet. Sollux mentally slapped himself. Karkat and Kanaya had walked to lunch, as neither of them owned a car. Sollux, however, did.

"KK, why didn't you call me? I would have picked you up tho you didn't have to walk in the rain."

Karkat huffed and trudged towards the bathroom.

"KK, wait. You're going to get the floor all wet. Let me get you thome clean clotheth."

Sollux hurried into the bedroom and opened Karkat's dresser. He retrieved the pajamas he knew were Karkat's favorites, and was beginning close the drawer when a spot of yellow cardboard caught his eye.

Quickly, before he could feel the pinch of guilt, his finger wrapped around the item and freed it from under the pile of sweatpants.

It was a journal.

The inevitable pinch closed over him. This was Karkat's journal. What if it was private? What would Karkat say if he found Sollux snooping through his stuff? Before he could second-guess himself, he shoved the book under his pillow and shut the dresser drawer.

Pajamas in hand, he strode out into the living room.

*

Karkat was still standing in the hall, the door now shut behind him. From his position, he could clearly see the television, which was showing his favorite movie. Was that…popcorn on the table? Sollux _hated_ popcorn. What was it doing there? Had Karkat made it earlier and left it there? He sniffed. No, he could smell the warm scent of it wafting in from the kitchen. It was fresh, so Sollux must have made it. Weird.

And why was his favorite movie playing? The volume was turned down low, but Karkat didn't need to hear it to know that Mary Ann was about to confess her love. Karkat held his breath and pursed his lips to stop himself from mouthing the words along with her. Just as Jonathon smiled and pulled her into his arms, Sollux came bounding out of their bedroom with Karkat's favorite pajamas in his hands.

Karkat's eyes narrowed. Why was Sollux doing all of Karkat's favorite things?

Sollux saw the look and smiled sheepishly. "How wath lunch? Did you have a good time?"

"Until I had to walk two God awful miles in rain that wanted to rip the flesh form my face, yes, I had a fantastic time listening to Kanaya dissect my pathetic life with perfectly manicured hands. Can I forego this stupid conversation and go shower now, or are you still being prissy about the floor?"

Before Sollux could respond, Karkat stepped off of the cheap "Welcome" mat by the front door and onto the tile of the hallway. He had stalked halfway down the corridor before the tile decided it didn't like getting wet, and Karkat's next step sent his sneaker sliding out from under him.

He waited for the cold, hard embrace of the white linoleum floor, but instead, he felt warm arms wrap tightly around him, and a hand tucked under his head to prevent the collision.

His eyes shot open (When had they closed?) and he looked up into Sollux's dichromatic eyes. On a shaky breath, he exhaled, "Thank you."

*

Sollux searched Karkat's face, concerned for his friend. Had Sollux managed to catch him in time? Was he hurt? Should Sollux say some-

"Thank you."

Karkat's eyes roamed over him, looking slightly disoriented. Sollux smiled softly and whispered, "Anything for you, Karkat."


	3. Chapter 3

Karkat sucked in a sharp breath. He loved it when Sollux used his full name, but the words that preceded it sunk heavily in his heart.

A momentary bubble of hope welled up in his chest, but it was popped by his traitorous, pessimistic brain. Sollux only meant he would help Karkat because they were friends. He wasn't implying anything deeper than that.

He sighed dejectedly and pushed himself out of Sollux's arms. He picked up the pajamas Sollux had dropped and carefully plodded into the bathroom. He turned the water on as hot as it could go, peeled out of his uncomfortably wet clothes, and tossed them into a pile in the corner of the room.

Stepping into the stream, he sighed as the scalding water hit the cold skin of his back. He quickly lathered his hair with shampoo, feeling the soapy tendrils bunch up under his fingers.

The shampoo was rinsed and whisked down the drain.

He washed his body slowly, more involved in his thoughts than in his actions.

Sollux had saved him from what would have been a nasty fall, and Karkat had an insatiable desire to repay Sollux for catching him. He grumbled under his breath. Why should he bother? Sollux was just being nice.

But _why_ was Sollux being nice? Two weeks ago, Sollux would have let him fall, and then laughed about it. What had changed?

Karkat sighed again. Whatever had caused Sollux to catch him was irrelevant; the facts were that he had caught Karkat, and now Karkat felt the need to pay him back.

He stretched languorously as the last suds swirled out of the tub. As he turned off the water, he reached for the towel he had left on the rack. He wiped the excess wetness off of his skin, shivering as the cold air of the bathroom caressed him. He shimmied into clean boxers and his pajama pants, and then shrugged on his shirt.

He exited the bathroom, vigorously rubbing his head with his towel. He headed towards the kitchen to make some much-needed coffee, but stopped in the living room.

Sollux had stretched out on the couch, Karkat's favorite blanket pulled over his torso, his long legs jutting out from the bottom. The movie was still playing, but Sollux was completely asleep.

Karkat's demeanor slipped and a soft smile formed on his lips. The bowl of popcorn sat untouched and forgotten, and the movie's credits were rolling. He took the bowl into the kitchen and reheated it while he waited for his coffee.

He took his bounty back into the living room and set it on the table. He pushed Sollux's legs out of the way and settled down comfortably on the couch. He hit rewind on the remote and waited for the movie to reach the beginning.

He had gotten back to the scene in which Mary Ann confesses her undying love for Jonathon when Sollux suddenly stirred. The sleeping boy rolled onto his side, blinked blearily, and sat up. This brought his face uncomfortably close to Karkat's.

"Hey, KK. Feeling better?"

Karkat mumbled a quiet "Yes," and nonchalantly scooted away from Sollux. Sollux sat completely upright and rearranged the blanket so it covered both of their legs. Karkat started to object, but figured it would be warmer if they shared. They settled back in to finish the movie.

By the time the end credits finally began, Sollux had reached his arm to rest on Karkat's shoulders and laid his head on top of the shorter man's. Karkat could feel as well as hear Sollux's heavy, constant breathing and was tempted to crawl out from under him. Before he could, Sollux stretched out his other arm to wrap around Karkat's waist, so the smaller sighed and adjusted them so that they were both lying down, with Sollux spooning Karkat's back.

Karkat grumbled and placed Sollux's arm over his waist so he was held firmly in place against Sollux's chest.

He thought, "This is almost as nice as the last time," and slowly drifted to sleep.

*

The next morning found Karkat pressed against Sollux's torso, face tucked against the taller man's neck. He could feel the sunlight streaming in from the window dancing across his back. He knew the light would be hitting Sollux's face, making his dark hair shine, but he couldn't bring himself to leave his current position to look.

The slow rise and fall of Sollux's chest told Karkat that his friend was still asleep. This knowledge gave him a burst of confidence, and he pursed his lips to press a butterfly kiss against the skin of Sollux's collarbone. The skin was soft and smelled of honey and popcorn.

The first kiss hadn't made Sollux stir, so Karkat felt it safe to press his lips back into Sollux's neck. Sollux still didn't move, so Karkat kept pushing light kisses into his skin, until it occurred to him that Sollux wasn't moving _at all_ : the up-and-down movement of Sollux's chest had halted.

A slow feeling of dread crept into Karkat's heart. He closed his eyes and swallowed thickly. Reopening his eyes, he carefully leaned backwards until he could see Sollux's face.

*

Sollux's eyes were open, but half-lidded. There was a small, soft smile on his lips, and he was absolutely comfortable.

When Karkat pressed the first kiss into Sollux's collarbone, Sollux knew the kisses would stop if he moved. He kept his breathing slow and regular, and hoped with all his heart that KK would keep kissing him.

The light touches continued and Sollux remained "asleep" until Karkat pushed a kiss into the sensitive spot underneath Sollux's earlobe. Sollux silently gasped in a breath and held it. The kisses continued briefly until realization hit Karkat. KK leaned back to look at him, and Sollux's soft smile spread slightly.

Karkat looked conflicted. The expression on his face flickered between angry, scared, and shocked, but there was a hint of hope in his eyes. When Sollux said nothing, the emotion roulette settled on scared.

"Sollux, I-"

"KK, why did you thtop?"


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own This is War or Pokemon

Sollux watched as Karkat debated with himself, eyes flickering rapidly over Sollux's smiling face. Sollux could tell KK was about to work himself into a frenzy.

"KK, you're over-thinking thith."

Karkat flushed slightly and mumbled, "No, I'm not. I just fucking kissed you. While you were sleeping. And you're a guy! This whole thing has to make me some kind of…perverted, creepy cougar fag or something."

"KK, it'th not like I mind. I _liked_ your kitheth."

"And that makes you a perverted, creepy _pedophile_ fag!"

Sollux used his last bit of strength to hold back a heavy sigh. "Karkat, hold on. Before you over-think tho hard your brain implodeth, let me help you. Okay?"

A grumbled "fine" spurred him on.

"The way I thee it, thith ithn't a very big deal. I'm gay, and you knew that when you moved in with me. I've alwayth thought you were bi, tho knowing you like guyth doesn't thurprithe me. Knowing you like _me_ doethn't bother me either, becauthe I like you too, KK. What you did ith fine. I'm not mad."

Karkat let out a breath he didn't know he had been holding.

"But I will be if you don't keep kithing my neck."

Karkat laughed softly and pressed another kiss into Sollux's neck, then pushed himself up off of the couch. He yawned and stretched (not unlike a cat, Sollux noticed), then turned to face Sollux.

"So…what does this mean?"

"…What do you mean, 'what doeth thith mean?"

"I mean, what are we? What does this make us?" Sollux considered his options.

If he told Karkat that nothing had changed, things would be awkward in the house. More importantly, it would mean no more kisses, and Sollux really wanted to find out if Karkat's lips were as soft on his own as they were on his neck.

Karkat was starting to look antsy, and Sollux realized he had been staring at the smaller man long enough to make Karkat uncomfortable.

"Well, I want thith to make uth boyfriendth. Ith… would that be okay?"

"Yeah, I guess I can be your stupid boyfriend," Karkat grumbled, but the 1000-watt smile on his face outshone the pseudo-indifferent tone of his voice.

Sollux sighed, relieved, and said, "Fantastic. My firtht order of duty ath your boyfriend ith to make uth breakfatht. Tho what will it be: Pop-tartth or waffleth?"

*

The next two weeks passed quietly. Karkat had immediately made it clear that he wanted to take their relationship somewhat slowly, and Sollux had gladly agreed, as long as he got a "Good night" kiss every night before bed.

True to his word, Karkat was on his way back to their bedroom after his shower, teeth freshly brushed so Sollux wouldn't think his kiss tasted nasty. Not that Karkat cared what Sollux thought…

The older man was ensconced comfortably in his computer chair, typing animatedly on his laptop's keyboard.

When Karkat entered the room, Sollux gasped and switched to a different page.

Karkat's eyes narrowed suspiciously. "What were you looking at?"

"Uh, nothing, KK. Don't worry about it. How wath your thhower?"

"Sollux Captor, don't you dare try to change the damn subject. The only thing you could've been looking at that would make you jump like that would be porn. So I'll ask you again: What were you looking at?"

"It wath thuppothed to be a thurprithe."

"Your porn would not 'thurprithe' me. It's probably some freaky, alien Japanese garbage. Click back to the page. I want to see what your pervy ass gets off on."

Sollux sighed. "It'th not porn, KK. I wath planning thomething for you."

"I do NOT want to be part of your scary hentai fantasies. Keep that shit to yourself."

"KK, let the thtupid porn thing go. I wathn't looking at thtuff like that. I wath doing rethearch on where I want to take you for our firtht date. And no, it doeth not involve alien porn. I wath looking up rethtaurant menuth. Happy now?"

Karkat was dumb-founded. Sollux was planning on taking him on a date? Where would they go? What would it be like? Would Sollux finally realize he didn't like Karkat and break up with him? Would-

"KK, thtop over-thinking tho much. Your mouth ith hanging open."

Sollux could practically hear the wires in Karkat's head short-circuiting. When the smaller boy made no move to close his gaping mouth, Sollux stood from his computer chair, approached Karkat, and kissed him soundly on the mouth.

When this had no affect, Sollux placed his hands on Karkat's shoulders and gently guided the speechless boy to his bed. He pushed softly, and Karkat fell into his mound of overly-soft blankets. Sollux maneuvered him into a horizontal position, covered him with at least three blankets, and stepped over to his own bed.

Sollux sighed internally. Yes, this was part of Karkat's "Take this faggotry-fest slower than dial-up" deal: they couldn't share a bed. Occasional naps on the couch were acceptable, but only if Karkat was too tired to protest, and only after Sollux had promised that he wouldn't try any "funny buthineth."

Sollux slipped under his covers and took off the glasses that covered is dual-colored eyes. He placed them carefully on the table by his head, curled up with his pillow, and said, "Good night, Karkat."

"When?"

Sollux rolled over to face the voice. "When what?"

Karkat sat up and replied, "When were you planning on taking me on the date?"

"Oh. I wath thinking Friday, if that'th alright."

Karkat didn't answer.

"KK? Ith that okay?"

"Sollux, are you aware that today is _Wednesday_?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"I need more than _one_ day to get ready for this kind of shit. I have to figure out what to wear, and get money out of the bank, and-"

"We'll go Thaturday inthtead, you'll look cute in anything, and you don't need any money." Sollux rolled back over. "I'm paying."

*

It was 9:45 on Saturday morning and Karkat was walking to his first class of the day, Anatomy. He had a list of movies that would be showing at the local theater in his hand, and he planned on spending most of his day staring at it, since Sollux had said he could choose what film they would see after dinner that night.

He got to class, sat down, and began to studiously stare at his list.

Sollux would probably want to see something action-packed and stupid. Karkat grumbled and scanned over the options on his paper. He saw that This is War was playing. It was a romantic comedy, Karkat's favorite kind of movie, but had enough explosions that Sollux wouldn't get bored.

He glanced up from his research and realized that the PowerPoint presentation his professor was discussing included a five-foot long, enlarged photograph of a penis. The professor was currently answering a question about how the body part became erect.

Karkat blushed spectacularly.

That was the one aspect of their date that Karkat had not thought about.

He and Sollux had enjoyed their fair share of make-outs (sloppy or otherwise) over the past fortnight, and they kissed at least once a day, but they had never explored this part of the other's body.

Karkat expected they would probably make out at the movies, as was typical for couples their age, but he didn't know if he'd be comfortable letting Sollux…touch him there. Or touching Sollux there. Would Sollux even want him to?

Karkat shook his head, as if to knock those thoughts out of his head.

Class was almost over, so he jotted down the assignment and gathered his stuff. It was eleven o'clock, and he didn't have another class until two, so he planned on going to the school's cafeteria to get lunch, then heading home to nap.

*

Sollux was stretched out on the couch mindlessly playing his favorite video game. His first class had ended at ten, and his next class wasn't until two. It was his only class with Karkat: English 102.

He had just wiped out his rival's Marshtomp with his level 22 Combusken when Karkat walked through the door with a brown paper bag in his hand.

"Hey, KK. How wath clath?"

"It was fun. We learned about dicks. How'd your morning go?"

"I'd have to thay it wath fantath-dick."

Karkat snorted and tossed Sollux the paper bag. "Here. I brought you lunch, since I figured you'd be too lazy to get off your ass and make yourself something."

"You'd be right in that ath-umption. What'd you bring me?"

"Tuna, you punny bastard."

"Fuck yeth. That'th my favorite. What'd you get?"

"Just a regular old PB&J. I got apple juice too. We can share if you don't want to get up and get your own drink."

"Thankth, KK."

Karkat flopped down on the couch next to his boyfriend (God, he still wasn't used to calling him that) and unwrapped his sandwich.

Sollux opened his own, then reached over to twine his fingers with Karkat's.

They ate lunch in a comfortable silence, broken only by Karkat occasionally berating Sollux for playing a children's video game.

Sandwiches and juice devoured, they curled up on the couch under Karkat's blanket to sleep until they had to leave for English.

Karkat tucked himself into Sollux's arms and nudged his head under the taller man's chin.

He was half-asleep when thin fingers grabbed his jaw and gently pulled his head back.

"Don't I get a 'good afternoon nap' kith?"

Karkat smiled warmly and leaned in to oblige.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (come on, guys. why do you have to be so awkward and bad at flirting?)

"Oh English class, how do I hate thee? Let me count the ways," Sollux thought to himself. It was three o'clock, and they still had another half an hour left in class. Karkat was zoned out, the notebook on his lap covered in doodles. He'd read Othello before, so he felt attending this lesson would be a waste of his time, but Sollux had given him a pleading look, complete with dichromatic puppy-dog eyes, and Karkat had begrudgingly pulled himself off of the couch and donned his shoes.

Now, after two pages of scribble notes and three of unrelated drawings, Karkat was getting antsy.

He was currently sketching out a low-quality version of the outfit he planned to wear that night.

Sollux saw this and laughed silently, then reached a hand over to hold Karkat's. Karkat jumped slightly with the initial contact, then relaxed when he realized that Sollux wanted to hold his hand. He let a soft smile grace his lips and looked over at the taller man. Sollux grinned widely at him, then handed him a small piece of paper.

Karkat pulled his hand out of Sollux's grasp and unfolded the paper. It said, "You excited for our date?"

Karkat picked up his pen and scrawled, "Of course I am, dumbass." He hesitated for a moment, then added, "It's my first date ever." He passed the note back to Sollux.

Sollux read Karkat's reply, then wrote, "Seriously? Then I guess I'm going to have to make it the best date you will ever have."

Karkat took the proffered note and scribbled, "You'd better make it good, or I'm never going out with you again. No pressure."

Sollux was suddenly too nervous to reply. He turned back to the professor's lecture. He realized with a start that the assignment was on the board and half of the class was heading towards the door. He stuffed his notebook into his book bag. He slipped the note into his pocket, then stood from his seat.

He looked over to his boyfriend, who was standing, bent at the waist to retrieve his backpack. Sollux found himself taking a moment to scope out Karkat's butt.

Damn, that was one _nice_ ass.

Sollux shifted slightly when Karkat stood back up.

Sollux laced their hands together and pulled Karkat to the door.

"I'm gonna shower when we get back, alright?"

"Thure. Jutht don't take too long. My thexy body needth wathhing."

"Whoa, who did you borrow a sexy body from?"

"Oh, ha-ha, KK. You know you like my body."

Karkat just snickered and led the way back to their apartment.

*

Two showers, two shots of mouthwash, and a good amount of hair product later, Sollux and Karkat were almost ready to go.

Karkat was in the process of getting dressed. He had on his favorite black pair of jeans, but he couldn't find the red, long-sleeved shirt he had been planning to wear. He was beginning to get frantic. He dug through the closet and his dresser, then resorted to rifling through the dirty clothes pile. Oh shit, he hadn't worn it already, had he? Oh fuck, if it was dirty, he'd have to pick another shirt. But red was Sollux's favorite color. Damn, where could it have gone?

Sollux exited the bathroom, completely ready and dressed except for his shoes. He saw Karkat rummaging through the basket of clean clothes at the end of Sollux's bed.

"What are you looking for?"

Karkat jumped. He hadn't heard Sollux enter the room. "I can't find my fucking red shirt. Did you mix it in with your laundry?"

"Karkat…you're already wearing you thhirt."

Karkat looked down so quickly his neck popped. Oh, damn. He was wearing it. When had he put it on?

"Oh, sorry. I guess I forgot."

"KK…are you…nervouth?" Sollux asked with a grin.

"No, fuckass. I am not 'nervouth.' Karkat Vantas does not get nervous. I am always the embodiment of confidence. I am consistently calm. I am-"

"Thhaking like a leaf in a tornado."

"…That expression doesn't even make sense. Shut up and help me find my shoes so we can get this shitty date over with."

*

It was 4:30 when they left the apartment. Sollux had estimated the walk to the restaurant he had chosen would take about thirty minutes.

He locked the door behind him and shrugged a gray jacket on over his plain black tee-shirt. He thought he looked nice, since his jacket matched his gray jeans perfectly. He hadn't been able to find his other black shoe, though, so he wore one white shoe instead.

He caught up with Karkat and slid his hand into the smaller man's. Karkat unconsciously (or maybe consciously?) shifted closer to him, and they began their quest for food.

The walk there was pleasant enough, with conversation topics ranging from school to friends to what they planned to order for dinner.

Karkat was perhaps a little too excited about the food.

"The best way to determine if a Mexican restaurant is decent is to taste their tamale. If they make shitty tamales, it's safe to say the rest of their food will suck too. I hope they have fried ice cream."

Sollux just smiled and listened to his boyfriend rant about the perfect salsa-to-chip ratio.

As he had anticipated, they found themselves at the restaurant's door at five o'clock.

They were seated and ordered drinks, then began the customary perusal of the colorful, plastic menus on their table.

Sollux immediately decided on cheesy chicken ("God, you are such a child.") and Karkat chose to get an enchilada, along with a tamale, of course.

They ate one-handed, as Sollux had refused to relinquish his hold on Karkat's hand.

"Tho what movie did you pick?"

"This is War. You're probably going to hate it, but you said I could pick, so suck it up."

Sollux laughed. "Why do you think I'll hate it?"

"It's half rom-com, half pointless fight scenes. You'll love the action-packed parts and hate all the good bits."

"You won't even thee the 'good' partth. Anytime the characterth kith, I'm gonna kith you jutht to pith you off."

"What the fuck? Why would you do that?"

"I'm paying. I can kith you whenever I want. And I _want_ to kith you when the characterth kith."

Karkat mumbled angrily under his breath, but let it drop. When their waiter came over to take their plates, Sollux asked, "Can we get thome fried ith cream, pleathe?"

"Yes, sir. I'll have it right out."

Karkat's grumpy disposition dropped for a second and he smiled at Sollux. Then he realized that he was supposed to being acting upset and resumed his disgruntled staring contest with the table.

When the dessert arrived, Karkat let go of Sollux's hand, grabbed the only spoon provided, and pulled the plate as far away from Sollux as possible.

"You can't have any because you're a jackass."

"That'th okay. I only got it for you. I'm thtuffed." Sollux leaned back in his chair and patted his stomach.

Karkat felt a jolt of…something shoot through his chest. It was sweet of Sollux to buy something just because he knew Karkat wanted it. He smiled softly and ate another bite.

*

"Oh, man," Sollux was thinking, "this was such a _bad_ idea."

He hadn't expected to get so… turned on by the sight of Karkat eating. He actually thought it was a little weird of him to think it was attractive. But when that pink tongue darted out to lick stray white smudges off of red lips…

Were these pants always this tight?

He wiped sweaty palms on his legs, then reached out and took the spoon from Karkat.

"Hey, fuckass. I was eating with that."

"Yeah, well, now I want thome."

"I thought you said you were 'thtuffed'?"

"I jutht don't want you to have any more."

"What? Why not? That's such a-"

Sollux slowly licked a drop of white off of his own lip, eyes locked on Karkat's.

Karkat blushed brilliantly. "I did not look like that."

"Yeth you did. You were totally trying to theduthe me."

"That's bullshit and you know it. I was just eating the damn ice cream. It's not my fault I looked sexy."

"You alwayth look thexy, KK."

"…shut up and go pay the bill."


	6. Chapter 6

"This was such a shitty idea. Why the fuck did we walk if you have a car?"

They had been fighting crowds and sprinting across busy streets for fifteen minutes, and now stood in the queue to buy their movie tickets.

"Becauthe I thought a walk through the thity would be romantic. I didn't expect you to be tho excited you'd drag me down the thtreet."

"Shut up. We're next in line."

They stepped up to the window. "Two for _Thith ith War_ , pleathe." Sollux handed over the required amount of currency and took the tickets the cashier passed under the glass window.

"Thank you, sir. Enjoy your show."

Sollux slid the tickets into his pocket and replaced his hand in Karkat's own. Karkat was still somewhat in awe of how Sollux was treating him. The other man had paid for everything so far, opened every door, and wouldn't relinquish his hold on Karkat's hand unless absolutely necessary. It made a weird feeling stir in Karkat's stomach. He liked it when Sollux treated him this way. It made him feel…loved.

True to form, Sollux was ahead of him, holding the door open with his free hand. "Do you want anything from conthethionth, KK?"

"Just a drink. Our shitty walk here made me thirsty."

"Alright, I'll go get it. Why don't you go thave uth thome theatth? Here'th your ticket."

Karkat took the ticket, nodded, and started towards the theater showing their movie.

*

Sollux took his place in line and pulled his wallet out of his back pocket. This date was going really well. He had never seen Karkat smile so many times in one night. Sollux's favorite one was when Karkat had looked down at their joined hands and smiled bashfully, like this whole experience was astounding to him.

He smiled unconsciously himself and moved up a place in line. He was contemplating whether he would actually kiss KK every time the on-screen couple kissed when he felt a tap on his shoulder.

"Hey, buddy. Don't you know you aren't supposed to wear the 3D glasses until the movie starts?"

Sollux looked down at the boy who had poked him. Small, blonde, and unappealing. "Yeah, I know. Thethe are my regular glatheth."

"Why do you talk like that?"

Sollux could feel his irritation growing. This kid looked at least eighteen. He obviously knew what a lisp was, so why was he harassing Sollux?

"Is it because you're retarded?"

"I can athure you, I am not retarded. I have a lithp. It'th a thpeech impediment."

"You're obviously mental. And you have a boyfriend too! You must be a huge pansy. Being gay is a sin, you know. And I bet that guy only holds your hand because you're 'thpethial."

Sollux thought, "If you punch this kid, you'll get kicked out. Kicked out equals angry KK equals no kisses."

Out loud, he retorted, "Thtep off, kid. Tho I'm gay and I have a lithp. There'th nothing you can do about it, tho leave me alone." He turned to face the cashier. "A large Mountain Dew and a bag of Thkittleth, pleathe."

Sollux paid and took his snacks. The kid behind him stuck out his foot, as if to trip him, but Sollux smoothly stepped around it and made his way into the theater. Now he just had to find Karkat.

*

What the fuck was taking that douche bag so long? It doesn't take six years to buy a damn soda. Idiot probably wouldn't even pick a good drink.

The lights began to dim. "Oh, hell no," Karkat thought, "that fucktard is NOT going to make me miss the previews."

Karkat grumbled incoherently under his breath and scanned the room again. Just as he was about to stand to go hunt for his MIA boyfriend, he saw a familiar, lanky body waltz into the room. Karkat raised his hand and waved at Sollux.

Sollux noticed and hurried over. He dropped gracefully into the seat next to Karkat and offered the smaller male the drink.

"Took you long enough. Why are you so fucking slow?"

"Forget about it. Look, the previewth are thtarting."

Karkat scowled, shifted in his seat, and gazed up at the screen. He didn't move again until after the movie had begun: he jumped when Sollux put a long arm around his shoulders and pulled him closer. Karkat was startled for a moment, then allowed himself to relax into his boyfriend's side.

He tensed when the characters leaned towards each other for the first time. Would Sollux really kiss him every time the characters kissed? Karkat had never kissed anyone in public before. Would the other people in the theater see them and -

On screen, lips touched.

Sollux remained still.

Karkat breathed a sigh, but was unable to decide if it was from relief or disappointment.

Still, he was anxious throughout the entire movie, and held his breath expectantly every time the actors kissed. He was almost too distracted to enjoy the movie. Almost.

When the lights finally came back on, Sollux stood and stretched (Why is he so unreasonably tall?), then offered Karkat his hand. "Ready to go, KK?"

Karkat nodded and rose, grabbing their trash and tossing it in a nearby garbage can. "Did you like it?"

"Eh, it didn't thuck like I had antithipated."

"So you liked it."

"Yep."

Karkat laughed quietly and steered them towards the door. He checked his phone and saw that he had six missed calls from Kanaya. Whatever. She was probably just trying to nose her way into his business again. Fuck that. Karkat would call her back later. Maybe.

They stepped outside and immediately Karkat shivered. "When did it get so ungodly cold out here?"

Walking home was going to suck.

*

Sollux noticed the tremor run through his boyfriend and released Karkat's hand. He shrugged his jacket off and passed it over to the smaller man. "Here, KK. I don't want you to get cold."

"…You don't have to do that."

"But I want to. Take it."

Karkat reluctantly reached out a trembling hand and took the sweatshirt. It was way too big for him, but it was soft and warm and smelled like Sollux. He donned it quickly and rejoined their hands. "Thank you."

"I've told you before, KK. I'll do anything for you. Now, let'th get you home."

*

Covered in extra cloth, the walk home wasn't as unpleasant as Karkat had expected. Sollux just kept him tucked into his side, hands locked firmly together.

When they arrived at the apartment, Sollux walked with Karkat to the door, then turned so they faced each other.

"Good night, KK. I had a lot of fun."

"Sollux, what are you doing? You live here too. You can just say goodnight to me before we go to bed."

"I know. But thith ith required for tonight to count ath a real date."

"Whatever. I had fun too, even though you are quite possibly mentally retarded and incapable of fulfilling your word in regards to kissing me. Good night."

Sollux leaned forward and pressed a chaste kiss on Karkat's lips, then retreated to unlock the door.

"You know, jutht becauthe I didn't kith you at the thame time the characterth kithed doethn't mean I wathn't counting. I have every intention of kithing you exactly ath many timeth ath the actorth kithed. That movie was overly-romantic. You're in for a long night."

Karkat, speechless, could only follow Sollux into the building.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, I am awful at remembering to type Sollux's lisp. I am also not good at writing conflict.  
> Bluh bluh bluh.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took too long to be this shitty. I'm sorry.  
> Also: Oh shit new tags and a new rating motherfuckaaaas.

Once inside, Karkat regained his vocal chords. He led them to their room, stopping only to kick off his shoes by the door. "Sollux, I don't understand why you've been acting like this all day."

Sollux paused, halfway through putting on a pajama shirt. "Like what?"

"Like, you're being gentlemanly and chivalrous. You've opened every door for me like they were the entrances to your fucking heart, and the money in my wallet is crying because it feels neglected."

"It'th my job. I'm your boyfriend, and that'th the boyfriendly thing to do. Would you rather I act like a dick like I uthed to?"

"No, no. It's just…this went a hell of a lot better than I thought it would."

"Oh, really?" Sollux jammed his legs into his sweatpants. "What did you expect?"

Karkat grabbed his pajamas and started towards the bathroom. He shrugged. "I guess I just didn't think you'd be so…romantic. I dunno. It was just a little…perfect."

Sollux came up behind Karkat and wrapped his arms around the smaller man's waist. "KK, _you're_ perfect. You detherve to be treated like that. I want to treat you like that every day."

When Karkat turned to face him, there was a small smile on his lips, and a light blush touching his cheeks.

Sollux pressed their lips together.

"One."

Karkat's eyes fluttered open (Shit, when had they closed?). "One what?"

"That wath one kith. Forty-thix left to go. I told you, I counted."

"And what if I decide I don't want you to kiss me at all?"

Sollux smiled mischievously. "I think I can change your mind."

He lowered his head and kissed Karkat's neck, dropping down to suck on his collarbone. "You know, KK, thethe kitheth don't count. I only counted lip-on-lip kitheth, tho I can kith you here ath much," a kiss on his now-flushed collarbone, "ath," another on his neck, right below his earlobe, "I," another, slower kiss underneath his jaw, "want."

"So what happens when you reach forty-seven?"

Sollux met his gaze. "That'th up to you."

Karkat's only reply was to lean forward and push their lips together once more.

"That one didn't count. I didn't kith you. You kithed me."

He froze when Karkat began to whisper against his lips. "What if I don't want you to count? What if I just want you to kiss me until I can't feel my lips any more?"

Sollux whispered back, "I think I can manage that," then sealed their lips together.

It felt like any of their other kisses, except now, Sollux could feel a hint of a smile on Karkat's lips. He was proud of himself for doing so well on their date. Honestly, he didn't really care how they ended the night, as long as he could spend it with KK.

But when he felt himself being pushed backwards onto his bed, he couldn't find it in himself to object.

Nor when Karkat climbed onto his lap and fused their mouths together.

Or when a small, pink tongue slid into his mouth. In fact, he found his own reaching out to stroke and rub against Karkat's.

God, _this_ was kissing. Not that he didn't like their "Good night" kisses, but making out was different. He like the way Karkat always threw himself into it, like Sollux wouldn't want him any more if he was a bad kisser. He really liked how Karkat would sometimes bite on Sollux's bottom lip.

He _loved_ the way Karkat was sitting on his thighs, arms wrapped around Sollux's neck, head tilted to allow Sollux's tongue access to his mouth, eyes closed in pleasure and concentration, little sounds of satisfaction bubbling up in his throat.

He also didn't mind the way Karkat's hips had started rubbing against his own.

He did, however, mind it when Karkat pulled away, looking somewhat dazed.

"Sollux, I have no idea what I'm doing, or how to even do this, but I know I want more of you."

"Jutht do what maketh you feel good. Anything you want, KK."

A deep breath. "I want to do this." Karkat nudged Sollux's shoulder backwards, then pushed against his chest until Sollux was lying down. Karkat stretched out over him and rejoined their lips.

Sollux let his arms rest on Karkat's back, hands splayed wide on the soft cotton of his shirt. He rubbed in small circles, then slipped a hand under the cloth.

Karkat seemed unperturbed, so his other hand joined the first. If he kept his fingers stretched, his pinky could dip under the waistband of Karkat's jeans.

He was about to pull back to catch his breath when Karkat sat up. The smaller man grabbed the hem of his own shirt and pulled it over his head.

Sollux's breath hitched, and he let his eyes roam over the newly-exposed skin.

KK was fucking _sexy_.

His stomach was flat, with a hint of muscle under the lightly flushed skin, and his nipples were dark and pert. He leaned forward and took one into his mouth.

Karkat even _tasted_ sexy.

Sollux flicked the nub with his tongue and sucked gently.

He was interrupted by the fabric of his shirt hitting his chin. His lips left his prize only long enough for Karkat to remove the shirt completely, then latched back on.

This was fantastic.

*

Karkat decided he couldn't let Sollux have all the fun, so he pulled away far enough that Sollux's lips were detached from their current station. He slid further down Sollux's legs, then licked a slow line across Sollux's collarbone, pressing soft kisses down to his chest. He kissed all around Sollux's nipple, only stopping a few times to flick it languorously with his tongue. He took it into his mouth and sucked on it lightly, while letting his hand come up to toy with the other, neglected bud.

Sollux groaned softly and leaned up into the touch. This movement caused their hips to roll together, drawing a startled moan from Karkat.

Impulse driving him, Sollux pushed KK backwards onto the bed, then climbed on top of him. He kissed from Karkat's neck down to his bellybutton, then looked up.

The look on Karkat's face was enough encouragement, and he pressed his lips along the waistband of his jeans.

His hands slide up Karkat's legs until they reach the little button standing between him and Karkat's obvious erection.

"Ith thith okay?"

Karkat's face is flushed and he seems short of breath, but, nevertheless, he nods. Sollux releases the button and unzips the jeans, looking up for approval before he pulls them off.

Impatient, Karkat kicks his legs out of his pants, then leans down to help Sollux out of his sweats.

"Of course your boxers have bees on them, since you only seem to be obsessed with the buzzing little fuckers. Why do you even-"

He's cut off when Sollux leans down and mouths his erection through his boxers.

"KK, if you don't want thith, tell me now. And if you do, thtop talking."

Karkat shut his mouth so fast his teeth clicked.

It reopened when Sollux dipped a hand below the fabric and freed Karkat's cock from its uncomfortable confinement. But when Sollux licked a stripe up the underside of his hard-on, all that could come out was a soft moan.

Which promptly doubled in volume when Sollux sucked the head into his mouth.

Sollux wrapped his hand around the base, then slowly took in as much of Karkat's dick as he could manage. When his lips touched his fingers, he chanced a look up at Karkat.

His head was thrown back, but Sollux could see his mouth forming a tight little o. Determined to make this first blowjob perfect for both of them, Sollux pulled backward until just the tip was left in his mouth, then dropped his head back down. He reached a hand down into his own boxers and started jerking himself roughly.

Karkat's legs began to quiver, and Sollux set up a steady rhythm bobbing his head, spurred faster with each one of Karkat's steadily increasing moans.

When he felt shaking hands slide into his hair, Sollux began pumping his fist in time with his nods.

All-too-soon, he felt the hands tighten in his hair, and heard Karkat hiss a warning.

"Sollux.."

When his head remained in place, Karkat tried again. "Sol, I'm about to-"

Sollux just sucked harder. The fist on his own dick sped up, until he pushed himself over the edge. The moan he let out vibrated around Karkat, and pushed him to release.

Karkat came with Sollux's name on his lips, his come on Sollux's.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is so short. (That's what he said)

Karkat wakes up clean, warm, and confused. When he tries to shift, he finds arms wrapped around his stomach, and decides that he had probably fallen asleep ridiculously quickly after Sollux sucked him off. Which left Sol to clean up their mess…

Sollux was seriously the best fucking boyfriend ever.

Karkat carefully extracted himself from Sollux's grasp and crawled out of bed. He heads for the kitchen, then breaks out the big skillet.

*

Sollux wakes up stiff, cold, and confused. Where'd KK go? He was here last night.. Maybe I scared him off. Did I go too fast for him? Fuck, what if I ruined our relationship? He won't want to be boyfriends with a pushy perv. Shit, I gotta fix this.

He pushes himself upright, but before he can swing his legs out from under the blankets, Karkat reenters the room, a plate in each hand.

Sollux briefly considers that Karkat wouldn't make him breakfast in bed if they were about to break up. "Good morning, Thunshine. What are thothe?"

"Breakfast, fuckass. Sit up."

Karkat waits for Sollux to get settled, then hands him a plate. It's loaded with scrambled eggs, shitty freezer-burnt sausage, and toast covered in honey, just the way Sollux likes it. Karkat's plate is identical, except that his toast has strawberry jam instead of honey.

They ate together quietly, then Sollux laid their plates on the floor. "Thankth for breakfatht, KK."

"Oh, don't thank me. It wasn't free."

"Yeah? And how much do I owe you?"

"Six kisses."

"…can I give you more than thix?"

"Absolutely."

Sollux decided sticky kisses with a hint of morning breath would be okay, since it would mean they were starting a new day together.

(Sollux wanted to start every day with Karkat.)

He leaned forward to pay his dues, but was interrupted by a buzzing noise near his head. Karkat groaned and reached under the pillow to retrieve his phone. He glared at the screen, then jabbed at it with his finger. "What?"

A tinny, angry voice responded.

Karkat listened intensely, looking more and more irritated with every passing moment. "Are you fucking serious? Those shitstains are coming here now?"

Oh, now Sollux understood. Kanaya, Karkat's cousin, had called him all night. Recently, Karkat's parents had threatened to come visit him to see his apartment and meet his 'room friend'.

Apparently, they'd be visiting soon.

Sollux wondered how they'd react when they found out the boys shared a room. And that they sometimes shared a bed.

And now, occasionally, shared a bed while three-fourths naked.

He rose quietly and took their breakfast plates into the kitchen. He rinsed them off, then placed them in the dishwasher.

He looked around the kitchen, and noted how much cleaning they had to do if KK's parents were really coming to visit.

There were stains on the counters, dirty dishes stacked in the sink, and a floor that had not been mopped since before they had moved in. A glance in the living room showed a similar state of disarray.

He headed back into their bedroom and flopped down onto his bed.

Karkat talked for a few more minutes, then grumbled, "Yeah, I love you too, you catty bitch," and jabbed the phone again.

"My stupid shitty parents have decided they can't go any longer without seeing my beautiful fucking face. They'll be on the plane tomorrow night. Kanaya said it's my responsibility to pick them up from the airport, so I'll have to be there at six o'fuckingclock in the morning. Also, you have to let me drive your car, since they don't know I spent the $2,000 they sent me on our TV."

"Where the fuck are they gonna thleep?"

"A hotel. Our trash heap is not big enough for four people. It barely even fits our emaciated asses."

"Do you want me to go with you to the airport?"

"Nah, my parents would probably want to spend the ride back here interrogating me about you, so when they meet you they can say, 'Oh, Karkat has told us _aaaall_ about you,' and I'd have to just let them be smug, lying bastards, since I don't talk to them about anything, let alone my crappy, weird roommate."

"Do your parentth even know you're bithexual?"

"…no. And I'm not sure I want them too.. Would you be okay with pretending to just be my…friend? And we can be boyfriends again when they leave?"

"Yeah, KK. Ath long ath you promithe we get to be boyfriendth again."

"Scouts honor."

"You hated boy scouts."

"Yeah, but I still _was_ one."

*

The day was spent cleaning furiously. The dishwasher cycled at least six times, and their cheap dishes were placed in the cupboards. Floors were scrubbed, clothes were washed, and the bathroom was tackled. At nine-thirty that night, Karkat flopped down on the couch. The only room left to clean was their bedroom, and they had decided that it could wait until the next day.

Sollux walked out of the kitchen, having just finished cooking dinner. "KK, thpaghetti'th done. Want me to dish you thome?"

"Yeah, fine. Bring it in here, we'll watch shitty cartoons."

One meal and two showers later, Sollux entered their room, rubbing his head with a towel. "KK, have you theen my thweatth? I can't find them."

Karkat glanced up from the novel he was reading, getting an eyeful of Sollux, boxer-clad, bent down to dig through his dresser. He took a second to admire the view, then stood up. "I think you washed them. Did you check the dryer?"

"Yeah, I did. That wath the firtht plathe I looked."

Karkat came up behind Sollux and wrapped his arms around his boyfriend. "You know, maybe you shouldn't like find them. I kind of like you like this."

"Why, Karkat Vantath, are you forgetting that we are thuppothed to be taking our relationship thlowly when it wath your idea in the firtht plathe?"

"Well, maybe I want to take things faster. I don't think you'd protest."

"I don't know...I think I might need thome perthuathion."

"You got persuasion last night. Don't act like you didn't like it."

"I didn't. I loved it."

"Oh, shut the fuck up."


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long.

The next morning was hectic. After two showers and a quick, shitty breakfast, the cleaning resumed.

By noon, all that was left to do was to change their bedding.

Sollux pulled the pillows off of his bed to remove his sheets, then quickly shoved them back down.

Karkat's journal was still under there. Shit, he had forgotten that he'd taken it. How did KK not notice it when they shared the bed? He had to put it back in KK's dresser drawer, right the fuck now. But how could he do it without Karkat seeing him?

"Hey, KK? Could you take the car and run to the grothery thtore? I think we should make your parentth lunch when they get here."

"Yeah, whatever. I'll get something they like. You're paying?"

"Yeah. Grab my wallet, it'th on the drether."

Karkat took his wallet and keys, then headed out.

When Sollux heard the front door slam shut, he seized the journal from under the pillows. He opened the drawer, but when he moved to put the book back, he found a piece of paper.

"I know you have my journal. You owe me an explanation and a blow job, you nosy piece of shit."

Fuck.

Oh, fuck, he was fucked.

*

He was lying face-down on his bed when Karkat returned with the groceries.

"Hey, dumbshit! Come help me put these away."

He sighed heavily into his pillow, then stood up. He briefly wondered what people would think when they found his corpse in the dumpster after Karkat strangled him for invading his privacy.

He went into the kitchen, but instead of grabbing a bag of groceries, he wrapped his arms around his boyfriend and buried his face in the back of Karkat's head.

Burrowed in soft hair, he whispered, "I'm tho thorry, KK. I didn't mean to take it. I jutht wanted to know how you felt about me."

Karkat, momentarily frozen, spun around in Sollux's grip and glared up at him. "This is about the journal, right?" Sollux nodded. "If I wanted you to know how I felt, don't you think I would have told you?"

Sollux sheepishly lowered his gaze. "Yeah, I gueth. I jutht… I wath really conflicted about how I felt about you, tho I thought if I knew what you were thinking, it would help me get my shit together. But I didn't even read it, if that'th any contholation."

Karkat considered this for a moment. "Right now, the only consolation I need from you is the rest of your dues."

Sollux's eyes snapped forward. "What do you mean?"

"I mean that you still owe me six kisses for breakfast yesterday, and now you owe me one fantastic session of fellatio for stealing my shit."

Sollux pulled Karkat closer. "You really aren't mad at me?"

"I will be if you don't hurry the fuck up."

Sollux sealed their lips together.

Karkat pressed the rest of them together.

*

Six lip-searing kisses later, their hips were flush against each other and Karkat's hand was wedged between them to get at the button of his own jeans.

Sollux dropped carefully to his knees when Karkat got the fasten undone, and pulled his boyfriend's jeans down to his thighs. The red, checkered boxers were next, and he greeted Karkat's cock with a slow lick around the head.

Karkat's hands gripped the counter. Fuck, why was he so hard already? It was like Sollux just had to look at him and his dick would spring up. He felt Sollux's tongue slide around the tip and he shuddered.

His legs were dangerously close to giving out when Sollux opened his mouth and took him in.

Oh jesus fuck your mouth is so warm. Yesss take more in. God yes Sollux, swallow my cock.

Then, the sound of keys jingling in the front door.

The door shut as jeans were being hastily readjusted. Sollux stood up as Kanaya walked into the kitchen, shot them both knowing looks, and smirked.

"Karkat, I do apologize if this is poor timing on my part, but I stopped by to inquire on the state of your apartment."

Karkat, attempting to even his breathing, replied, "Sparkly fucking clean. Get out."

Kanaya stepped away to inspect the living room, looking around suspiciously. "Is it really?"

Sollux, whose face was an unholy shade of red, strode down the hallway and ducked into the bedroom, shutting and locking the door behind him. There was _no fucking way_ he was going to try to deal with KN right now. It's like she had planned to walk in at that exact moment. Now he was stranded in his own bedroom, uncomfortably embarrassed and painfully hard. Damn Kanaya.

He flopped onto the bed and reached one hand under his waistband, unbuttoning his shorts with the other. A ridiculously unsatisfying moment later, he threw a wad of used tissues into the trashcan and laid back on the bed.

The sound of door slamming prompted him into the living room, and he found Karkat crumpled on the sofa.

"KK? You alright?"

Wordlessly, Karkat pointed at a small, wicker basket on the kitchen table. Sollux rifled through it, only to find that KN had left them matching, preposterously fancy outfits, along with a card stating that the "Vantas Party" had reservations for 6:30 tomorrow night at Arezzo's, the city's most obnoxiously overrated restaurant.

He found a note taped to the back of the card.

"Sollux, I know that you and my cousin are involved in a romantic situation as of a fortnight ago. I offer you my congratulations on this development, but must also offer you my condolences. You see, Karkat and his parents are not of the same opinion regarding homosexuality, and I feel the need to warn you of their possible prejudice against you because of your preferred gender. It might be best for you, and for Karkat, to refrain from mentioning the extent of your relationship to his parents, at least until their trip is over. Best wishes, Kanaya."

At the bottom, in a different pen, she had hastily added, "I would also recommend you abstain from any obvious acts of oral sex in semi-public places. Karkat's parents do not approve of voyeurism, regardless of the participants' genders. Also, the next time I walk in on you two, I will not hesitate to take pictures."


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for taking so long. I graduated from high school, had family issues, blah blah lame-author excuses.
> 
> Here's the second-longest chapter yet to make up for my lameness. I apologize if it sucks.

Sollux woke up alone the next morning. He could hear the shower running, and his bed was still warm, so Karkat must have just woken up. He glanced at the clock. Why the hell was KK up so early?

The shower shut off, and a moment later there was a scowling, slightly dripping, and almost-completely naked Karkat glaring down at him from in front of the closet.

"Get up, you lazy fuck. Go shower. And made sure you put actual clothes on afterwards, not pajamas."

Sollux groaned, stretched, and sat up. "Why can't I jutht lie in bed all day? Ith that too much to athk?"

"Because my parents are coming today, and I get the feeling that your _stunning_ personality alone will not win them over. I have to leave for the airport in twenty minutes, and I'm calling your happy ass when I get there. If you're still in bed, I will verbally beat the shit out of you. Am I clear?"

Sollux just snickers and pulls himself out of bed. He gathers clothes and heads into the bathroom.

An uneventful shower later, he dresses, checks his phone, and, upon seeing that Karkat had yet to call, strolls into the kitchen.

He is sitting on the counter, eating bologna straight out of the package when he hears keys in the lock.

"Shit fuck they're early!"

He catapults off of the counter, throws the lunch meat back into the fridge, and rapidly washes his hands to get rid of the smell of meat. He is drying his hands on a dishcloth when Kanaya steps into the kitchen. He almost breathes a sigh of relief, but realizes, last-minute, that having Kanaya in his home could be just as scary as the prospect of meeting KK's parents.

"Fuck, KN, you thcared me. What are you doing here?"

"I came to make sure that you were, as Karkat so eloquently put it, 'Not dressed like a bumfuck idiot.' I can see that his worries were unfounded. Do you need anything else while I am here?"

"I don't think tho, but thankth."

"Is everything alright?"

"Yeah, the houthe ith clean, we bought food for lunch, and I'm not drethed like a moron."

"No, I meant between yourself and Karkat?"

"Oh, yeah, I gueth tho. He told me that we have to act like not-boyfriendth while hith parentth are here though. Tho I'm not thure if it'th a temporary thing or if he doethn't want to be boyfriendth at all."

Kanaya hums thoughtfully, but does nothing to alleviate Sollux's concern. He scowls at her briefly, but she merely smirks and shrugs.

She leaves, and Karkat calls. It's a short, "I'm here. You're up? Good," phone call, and Sollux spends the rest of his wait reading over the calculus homework he's been neglecting.

KK texts him, saying that his parents' flight just got in. He's taking them to the hotel to drop off their bags, then home for lunch, and could Sollux please put a pot of water on the stove to boil?

Sollux shuts his book and stands up from his slumped position on the couch to go start the water. When he judges it to be ready, he opens the package of rotini noodles he retrieved from the pantry and dumps it into the pot. Karkat had cooked the chicken last night, so all that was left to do was make the sauce for the pasta. Sollux looks over the index card with the careful, detailed instructions that KK had left him, and pulls another pot out of the cupboard. He throws butter, cream cheese, and all the other shit into it, and turns on the burner.

Karkat walks in as Sollux is draining the noodles. The steam burns his hand, but he holds back his furious shout, finishes dumping the pasta into the colander, and runs his hand under cold water.

He dries his hands carefully and heads into the living room, where KK has corralled his parents. His father, dressed in a business suit and fancy (stupid) fedora, shakes Sollux's hand, and Sollux tries not to wince when his fingers press into the now-tender spot on his palm. KK's mother, who Sollux can only describe as bright, rejects the proffered hand in favor of viciously pulling Sollux into a hug and saying, "Oh, Sollux, it's so good to meet you! Karkat has told us _all_ about you."

Over her head, KK shoots him an "I told you so," look, then tries to gently remove his mother from Sollux's waist. She holds on just a bit longer, then lets go, only to latch onto Sollux's wrist. "Karkat said you were making lunch. Need any help?"

"No, thank you, Mrth. Vantath. Everything'th all ready to go." When he feels Karkat glaring at him, he reconsiders. "On thecond thought, maybe you could help me thet the table?"

Mrs. Vantas nods cheerfully and follows Sollux into the kitchen.

Alone with his father, Karkat sighs heavily and drops down onto the couch. "How was your trip, Dad?"

"Flying is shit. I'd rather drive, but you know how your mother gets when she's cooped up for too long." Karkat grunts noncommittally. "Speaking of driving, kid, how's driving your friend's car going for you?"

Karkat eyes him warily. "What are you talking about?"

"Boy, we put that money into your account. You think we can't see what you did with it? And unless Best Buy sells cheap-ass junkers like the one you picked us up in, you spent my hard-earned cash on the boob tube over there on the wall."

Karkat knew better than to try to argue with his dad. The man wasn't really abusive, but his friends called him 'Slick' for a reason: He could stab anybody with anything and get away with it. Karkat glances nervously at the pencil on the desk behind his father and gulps. "I'm really sorry, old man. I just figured I wouldn't need a car. Sollux has one and I can walk pretty much anywhere I need to go."

"Just shut up, kid. I got over you wasting my money a long time ago. I just wanted to give you shit for it."

They spend a moment glaring half-heartedly at each other before Karkat's mother calls them for lunch. They rise simultaneously, give each other matching once-overs, and casually stroll into the kitchen.

The sight that greets Karkat is so ridiculously domestic that he can't decide if he loves it or wants to laugh at it. Sollux is bent over at the waist, trying to dig in the pantry for a package of seldom-used napkins, wearing the apron that his friend Dave got him for 'ironic purposes'. His mother is rearranging the plates on their shitty table with her own apron (she brought that with her?) covering her multi-colored dress, and there is a big steaming bowl of chicken alfredo placed in the middle, ready to be consumed.

His father seems unfazed by the cuteness in the room, and simply sits down on one side of the table. Karkat sighs inwardly and plops into the chair across from him. His mother picks up the forks from the counter, hip-checks Sollux as he is taking off his stupid (adorable) apron, and finishes distributing silverware. Sollux has a bewildered look on his face as he sets the napkins on the table and takes his seat.

Mr. Vantas takes one look at the food on the table, shoots a challenging glare at his son, and scoops an enormous serving into his own bowl. Before Karkat can react, his father is shoveling the pasta into his mouth like it was the first meal he'd had in weeks, while maintaining a level stare in Karkat's direction. Seeing the challenge for what it was, Karkat immediately heaps an equivalent share into his bowl and begins devouring his lunch.

Sollux watches in horror as the two men gobble their food. He had worked hard to make this shitty lunch, and they were eating so fast they wouldn't even taste it. He hastily shoots his foot out under the table, aiming for Karkat's shin. He jolts with terror when he sees Mr. Vantas jump as though he had been kicked, then realizes that Karkat had jumped as well. Confused, he looks up to see Mrs. Vantas giving him a knowing smile and a thumbs-up.

"Boys, really, can't you control yourselves? Sollux put a lot of work into this lunch, and you're eating too fast to taste it!"

Karkat and his father shoot equally distressed looks at Mrs. Vantas, but she holds firm. "I know you haven't seen each other in a while, and you have to do your whole father-son competition thing that you always do, but can't it wait until after we've eaten?"

The two men make eye contact, sigh, and resume eating at a better pace. Sollux sends Mrs. Vantas a grateful look and scoops his own serving of pasta. He motions for Mrs. Vantas to hand him her bowl, and dishes her serving as well.

The rest of lunch is uneventful, excluding the constant glaring between Karkat and his father. Karkat's mother suggests that he should drive his parents to their hotel, stating that "I'm exhausted, and your father probably is too. I think we could both go for a nap! Afterwards, you can show us around town before we head to dinner."

Sollux slumps onto the couch as soon as the door shuts behind them. His reprieve is killed, however, when the door shoots back open. He sits up just in time to see an exasperated Karkat storming towards him. Seconds later, he has a lap full of his boyfriend, and absolutely no protests.

"I told them I forgot my wallet. Wouldn't want me driving without my license, would they?"

Sollux has no time to respond, as his lips are quickly occupied with kissing Karkat until neither of them can breathe.


End file.
